Jeff Levy, LCSW
Mental Health, Relationships, Trauma, Identity
Jeff Levy, LCSW (originally posted on Branching Out: The Live Oak Blog, August 2016) Monica had been adopted when she was days old. She knows nothing about her biological family, but came to therapy because of years of abuse and neglect in her adoptive family. She describes her mother as cold, critical, and dismissive. Her father was physically and verbally abusive. In retrospect, she believes he had a drinking problem, but as a child, she assumed the abuse and neglect she endured were related to something wrong with her; that if she behaved better, got better grades, anticipated her parents’ needs more quickly, she would be rewarded.
At 42, Monica is a professor at a local university, owns her own home, and has published numerous articles. Still, she believes she is unworthy of giving or receiving love. And to make matters more complicated, she believes that she needs to love herself before anyone else can love her and before she can love anyone else.
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1/6/2019 0 Comments Closer Than We ThinkJeff Levy, LCSW (originally posted on Branching Out: The Live Oak Blog, March 2014) When I talk about the work I do I with other professionals and students, I often share that some of my most intimate relationships are with my clients. I frequently see eyebrows raise; often two people glancing at one another with a knowing look. I imagine they are silently communicating their judgment---that I have a problem with boundaries. I wonder if they are thinking that I am lonely, or sad…or that I don’t know how to meet my needs in my personal relationships.
1/6/2019 0 Comments Why Are You Telling Me This?Jeff Levy, LCSW (originally posted on Branching Out: The Live Oak Blog, March 2014) I am a therapist. I am white. I am a man. I am a little beyond middle aged. I am in a relationship. I am organized. I like the color blue. I like plants. I like dogs. I like turning flea market finds into useful furniture. I have a bad back. I am Jewish. I am busy.
Knowing Without Telling Why am I telling you all of these things about me? Why would I begin with these statements about myself? I share these before you know anything else about this blog because these are self-disclosures—and my clients know many, if not all, of these things about me while making a first appointment and/or within a few minutes of sitting with me. In looking at me, my office, and through the process of scheduling a first appointment, I have “disclosed” an incredible amount of information about myself. 1/6/2019 0 Comments Crossing the LinesJeff Levy, LCSW (originally posted on Branching Out: The Live Oak Blog, February 2014) Marty consistently talked about his garden each time we met for therapy. It was his greatest source of pride and, since he retired, where he spent most of his time. He described it in great detail, often telling me about new plants he had bought or perennials he had transplanted. He brought in pictures of his garden frequently and eventually asked me directly if I would come see it. Rob had been in therapy several times before seeing me. He was insistent that it had helped, but he wanted to work on some very specific issues that he read were areas of expertise for me. In our initial phone conversation, he shared that he lived several hours away and it would be extremely difficult to see me weekly. He also shared that he lived in a small community and he didn’t want to see anyone with whom he may have contact in his daily life. He asked if I would consider seeing him for two-hour sessions, once per month. |
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February 2019
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